Gone the Way of Ian Curtis
by elejamie
Summary: My first M-rated fic. Ed is involved in an accident. Eddy could've saved his life, but he didn't. Depressed, he kills himself. I didn't really like this story; but you're more than welcome to read it.


-1Gone the Way of Ian Curtis

A/N: Well here it is. My first M-rated fic. Once I've done this, I'll write another fanfic, but this time, it'll be based on a different show. Oh, and please review TFF (the Film Festival), so I can continue Ed and Eddy do: Eurovision 2009.

OK, this story is about an accident involving Ed that makes Eddy suicidal. This takes place a few years in the future (but I won't say when). Oh, and Edd swears at Eddy. To those who've never heard of Ian Curtis, he was the lead singer of Joy Division, until his suicide in 1980 at the young age of 23, due to a failing marriage and epilepsy. The rest of the band formed New Order. However, Ian hanged himself, when Eddy does something different…

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Eddy got another shot glass as we poured the rest of his whiskey into it. He had been feeling depressed since the accident. Edd refuses to speak to him, ditto the rest of the cul-de-sac, and his parents kicked him out of the house. About a month later, his brother returned to stay for a year. Eddy missed his chance to say "Hello" to his brother, following him graduating from Oxford. He tried his best to forget about it, but it just won't go away.

It all started when Ed started doing drugs. He started off from doing prescription pills, to buying some with his comic book money. His parents, and Sarah, then didn't speak to him, especially Sarah. From time to time, they made an intervention, even going as far as getting one of Ed's heroes to come, but it didn't work.

"Ed, maybe you should stop." Edd tried to pull away a packet of cannabis from Ed.

"Fuck off." Ed bit Edd's hand, which made our genius friend shriek in pain.

"Don't do that again, you hear?" Edd told his yellow druggie friend off.

"Whatever, I'm going out for more pot."

"Don't you dare." Edd then picked up a chair and threw it at Ed. But due to his weakness, he only threw it onto his foot.

"If that chair had hit me, I'd punch you in the balls so hard, they'll go back in your body." Ed threatened.

"Never mind…" Edd groaned.

Eddy was watching this through Ed's window, and broke in. "Ed," he addressed. "What the fuck made you start?"

"It's none of your business!" He pushed Edd into Eddy. Then our short friend picked up picked up Baron O'Beefdip. He then threw it at Ed, and it hit him in the back of the head. Ed, infuriated, didn't feel anything, and continued to storm out of his room. He nearly went out of the door, but was stopped by Sarah.

"Ed!" His red-headed sister yelled. "You are not going out, you're grounded."

"Shut up, Sarah." He punched her in the stomach. She kneeled down and bent forward, clutching her chest. She was trying to hold back tears, and was quite successful.

Eddy then went back to reality. He then got up and tried to find his keys. Or, correctly, the keys to the car he stole. He grabbed his fake ID, then drove off. He drunkenly stumbled to the car, then fell asleep at the wheel, setting off the alarm. He then went back to flashbacking.

"What is it now, shorty?" Ed saw Eddy after waking up from his slumber. He had a hangover from clubbing, especially what he did in the men's toilet.

"Ed, you bastard." Eddy began. "Look what the drugs have done to you. First up, you've changed, man."

Ed held back tears. "Don't do this to me."

"You know what? Fuck you. Your sister's a slut if you ask me. I wouldn't save your life even if you were being burned alive."

Ed was slowly getting pissed off.

"You're getting nowhere in life, and you'll be kicked out of the house soon."

Ed finally snapped and beat Eddy to a pulp. "I fucking told you! Don't do that to me!"

Eddy, with a nosebleed, managed to escape from Ed, and hide out somewhere. Ed then went out and consulted the local drug dealer. Eddy, who was hiding in a trash can, saw everything that took place.

"I need about a bag of cocaine, a bag of heroin, and your finest needle." Ed selected what he wanted as if he was reading a menu.

"You got the money?" A mysterious figure, lurking in the shadows, requested that Ed handed over about $25000. He didn't have that amount of money, so he just picked up a gun and shot at the dealer's hand. He then grabbed the briefcase, and ran away.

Back at his house, he created a speedball. He injected it into himself. At first he felt calm and relaxed, then he got 'hyperactive'. Then he died. Sarah came down to see Ed, but instead, she met his lifeless body. She thought he was sleeping at first. Then she grabbed his arm and then found out. Ed was dead.

Eddy then woke up from his drunken slumber and was found to be lying down on the street. The rightful owner of his car got the car back, but didn't want Eddy to be arrested, even though he was clearly intoxicated. The owner thought boys will be boys. However, Eddy still went back to his room, a littered one-room basement, mostly full of bottles, and a sole mattress without pillows or a quilt. He struggled to find an alcoholic drink to wash away the memories of the accident, to no avail. He then thought: "This is it. I cannot live with the guilt anymore. I have to end it all".

But first, he had to think of a method. Then he noticed the river near The State's state capital. It is a popular suicide spot. 35% of all suicides using the river are by jumping from the bridge; 42% are by drowning; and the remaining 21% are other methods. He then thought… "Should I jump, drown or other?"

Eddy decided that he should think on the way there. However, it's the overbearing guilt that makes Eddy want to end it all, not a lack of drink. He then narrowed it down to jumping or drowning, since he can't find a gun, so he can't shoot himself. Or some rope, which rules out hanging, but a lack of a neck can also contribute.

He then got a piece of paper, and a pen. With the pen, he wrote a note, and so began his suicide note. However, to make sure he spells it correctly, he used a dictionary to look up words.

_Dear world,_

_I have decided to end it all. The guilt is too much to bear. Ever since Ed's overdose, I have felt miserable. Just the other day, Double D called me a 'wanker'. I don't know what that means, but I just can assume that he swore at me. Everyone who reads this note, don't bother looking for me, because I'm already dead._

_Eddy_

He signed his name, and set off. The first problem is getting there. He's banned from public transport, due to the accident, although an incident before might've been the cause. So he just decided to walk. He decided to hide his face, and went off to the river.

After half an hour, he reached the suburbs. Walking by, he saw the cul-de-sac, which would've been full of kids playing, and the Eds concocting some sort of scam. Now, it was devoid of life, only Sarah, Jimmy and Rolf remaining at their homes. Eddy shed a tear as he reminisced. But it was his fault. He just walked on by, not noticing Jimmy peeking out of the window.

"There goes a broken man…" mused Jimmy, looking on as Eddy carried on his journey.

He then passed by what had been the candy store. It was closed because it didn't make enough money, and gone the way of Woolworths. He stared through the window, placing his palms gently on the glass. He sighed as he imagined the old gang, him, Ed and Edd, buying jawbreakers with the money they got from scamming. He then placed his arms back by his side, and stood away from the glass window. Now, what would've been jawbreakers, fudge and other sweets, was now boarded up, but from a crack, Eddy can see that everything has been painted over in white paint, and the lights are off. Eddy nearly shed a tear, but continued anyway.

He came across another memory: the school. It was still standing. Eddy might've detested school, but he can still remember some of the things he did here. For example, coming up with an escape plan involving a plane made out of materials based around the school. He walked on by, as it began to rain.

Looking up, raindrops began to fall onto his face. It didn't worry him the least. He then muttered under his breath lyrics of an old song he heard: "There is no faith in which to hide, even truth is filled with lies. Doubting angels swore to walk among the living."

After about 15 minutes, he finally reached the city limits. Normally, this is where people would hitch-hike. However, due to terrible weather, and the fact that people rarely accept hitch-hikers, ever since a deranged maniac killed a car-full of people, and stole the car. Eddy didn't watch the news. Or read the newspaper. So he just decided to hitch-hike.

A good 5 minutes passed without any cars coming, so Eddy put his thumb down and sat on the grass. It was moist, yet the patch Eddy was sitting on was still dry. Then, just as he was about to just go 'home', he could hear a car coming. Eddy rushed back to the side of the road, and stuck his thumb back up. The car just drove by, ignoring Eddy. Had he been a few centimetres towards Peach Creek, he would've gotten covered in mud.

After 10 more minutes, he finally found a car that would accept him. He got in, and then ejected the driver. He didn't know how to drive, so he managed to drive maniacally. It was only until he was 10 minutes away from his destination that the driver stopped him. Consequentially, it was the same driver who didn't arrest Eddy when he stole the car. Eddy could see it in the distance, and so, he walked to the river.

After a good 7 minutes, he reached the river. He took off his shoes, and looked towards the city in the horizon. It had stopped raining, and a rainbow was visible. He breathed in deeply for the last time. He sighed, and walked towards the river. Just then, he found a sharp stone. He slit his wrists with it, then continued on his journey. He felt that he was like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown. And this time, he was coming down. He was in this mood because of scorn, and he is now in a mood for total war. He'll fly to the darkened skies once more, and ever onward. He then threw the stone in the water, and then remembered all the good times he had with Ed and Edd. He shed a tear as he walked to his doom.

The water was now about his-chest-high, but he then had second thoughts. Should he continue? But he shook this off and continue. He's lost about 25% of his blood by now. And there's a mass blood streak following him.

After a minute or so, the water reached his head. "Well, this is it. Here I go." He muttered to himself, and he started to walk further. Then, his head, along with the rest of the body, was completely submerged. It wasn't him ducking, nor was it him losing enough blood. There was a steep dip in the middle. It was nearly complete.

With only a minute left to go before he passes on, he had a near-death experience. From his birth, to the accident, he remembered all the main points in life. If he wasn't drowning, he would've cried. But he can't. He couldn't, as long as he was still alive. He then gurgled "I only come here, seeking peace. I only come here, seeking me. Seems I came to leave."

Then, he was no more. Bereft of life, he has ceased to be. He had hoped that Edd will not follow suit, and instead will go into therapy.

And that did happen. When Edd was 25, he had moved on from his friends passing away, thanks to therapy. He is now a Nobel Peace Prize winner, solving the Israeli-Palestine conflict. He has since ditched the hat, and sports a raven-haired mullet. He wears glasses, but instead they are more sporty. He wears a white lab coat, and is one of Israel's top scientists, since he moved to his father's birthplace, Tel-Aviv, 4 years ago. However, he wasn't alone, as Nazz, whom he married 2 years ago, lives with him. Even though Edd didn't mind what religion she was, she still converted to Judaism. He had gotten over being tongue-tied, also thanks to therapy.

In his office was a mahogany desk and office chair. On the desk were a couple of books, unopened. Next to them stood a picture of him, Ed and Eddy, taken a year and a month before the accident. On the wall was a Coldplay poster, which is what Edd bought whilst on holiday in England, his home country.

He then grabbed the picture, and stared deeply. It gives him memories, and he shed a tear, and whispered "Ed, Eddy, when I die, I'll let you visit me in Seventh Heaven."

He looked away when he heard his door open. In stood Nazz, breastfeeding a baby. She was wearing a green and white striped jumper, with khaki trousers and white trainers. "Are you OK, darling?" She asked.

"I'm fine." Edd replied. He turned around to watch the sun go down over the horizon.

"Well, I've just dished up. Are you coming?"

He turned around, and nodded his head. He put the picture down, and headed out of the room, turning the light off behind him.

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A/N: Wow. I've finally finished it. It took days because of school. And procrastination.

To those who want to know what my first non-Ed, Edd n Eddy fanfic will be, it's a Homestar Runner fic. Starring Marzipan and Strong Sad.

So, er… review TFF, so I can continue Ed and Eddy do: Eurovision 2009. And also, due to this, I've pushed back the Pool's ClosED sequel. So sadly, you have to wait a few months.

And not forgetting, I made references to two songs in this fan fiction:

The first was VNV Nation-Darkangel (one word, not two). The quotes '"There is no faith in which to hide, even truth is filled with lies. Doubting angels swore to walk among the living."', 'He was in this mood because of scorn, and he is now in a mood for total war. He'll fly to the darkened skies once more, and ever onward.' and 'He then gurgled "I only come here, seeking peace. I only come here, seeking me. Seems I came to leave."' came from that song, although 'He was in this mood because of scorn, and he is now in a mood for total war. He'll fly to the darkened skies once more, and ever onward.' is actually 'I'm in this mood because of scorn, I'm in a mood for total war. To the darkened skies once more, and ever onward' is the actual lyric.

The second was The Verve-the Drugs Don't Work (which isn't about things like cocaine, cannabis, etc… but more about medicinal drugs, and how the lead singer's dad was dying, and the drugs he [the dad] took couldn't save him). The quote 'He felt that he was like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown. And this time, he was coming down.' came from this song, but the real lyric is 'Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown, this time I'm coming down'.


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